Tuesday, April 3, 2012

A Cebuano columnist does a "Carlos Celdran"

From Sun Star Cebu, comes this ghastly and idiotic commentary from an unknown journalist who surprisingly won a Golden Dove Award.

No wonder GMA is not a member of the KBP, which hands out the award!

Oh, wait, this columnist is employed by GMA.


"Walang kinikilingan, walang kasinungalian, serbisyong KATANGAHAN po lamang!"

This columnist, Bobby "Bobo" Nalzaro, (over there  --->) started this rant about the Latin Mass after CBCP president and Cebu Archbishop Jose Palma celebrated a Solemn Pontifical High Mass recently.

By the way, that photo came from a Wikipedia entry.  WHA?!  Wikipedia knows him?  Who does?!?!  Oh, wait.  It's Wikipedia.  He might have made it himself.  HA!

(Kudos to Basilio and Noah for the tip.  Keep it coming boys!)


PATER noster, qui es in caelis, sanctiticetur [Good grief!] nomen tuum. Adveniat regnum tuum. Fiat voluntas tua, sicut in caelo et in terra. Panem nostrum quotidianum da nobis hodie, et dimitte nobis debita nostra sicut nos dimittimus debitoribos [bos?] nostris. El [Wah?] ne nos inducas in tentationem, sed libera nos a malo.”

“Ave Maria, gratia plena, Dominus tecum. Benedicta tu in mulieribus, et benedictus fructus ventris tui, lesus. Sancta Maria, Mater Dei, ora pro nobis peccatorinus [a 10 year old altar boy would know this is wrong.] nunc, et in hora mortis nostrae.”

[Genius alert!  He cut and pasted these.  And still he got it wrong!  :D]

Have something to report? Tell us in text, photos or videos. [What the?!?!?]

“Ice cre-am for sa-le he-re. Do-not uri-nate he-re.”  [Haha. Very. idjit.]

Do you understand what the words above mean? The first paragraph is the Latin version of “Our Father.” The second paragraph is the Latin version of “Hail Mary.” The third one, pronounced like Latin, actually is, “Ice cream for sale here. Do not urinate here.” Ha, ha.  [Haha. Kill me now please.  The guy is doing stand up comedy without even standing up.  Try the young kids of Baguio and Davao and they'll recite the Rosary in Latin for you.  It does not mean you do not know it means that everyone does not know it! Idjit.]

The “Doctrine of Rabatitat” is not Latin. This was coined by the late veteran trial lawyer Amadeo “Matoy” Seno [Who he?] to antagonize his lawyer-opponents, especially the young ones, in court.

How many of us understand Latin? Only very few. [weh?] Not even lawyers and law students, who usually quote Latin legal maxims like “argumentum ad hominem” (an argument directed to a person), “argumentum ad ignoratiam” (an argument based upon ignorance), [HEY HE KNOWS THIS!] “subpoena duces tecum” (to summon documents), “subpoena ad testificandum” (to invite a witness), alibi (at another place, elsewhere), “amicus curiae” (a friend of the court), “res ipsa loquitur” (the thing speaks for itself), “arbitrium est judictum” (an award is a judgment), and the most famous, “vox populi, vox Dei” (the voice of the people is the voice of God).  [He wrote that not all lawyers and law students know these phrases.  Wah!  The Philippine Bar is THAT bad!]

Latin has survived in one form or another for over 2,000 years. It is both the cognate and parent of many modern languages. Some say that Latin is a dead language. Meaning, it no longer adopts new words or meanings, unlike the English language that continues to evolve. [Hit me in the head pleeeeaaassseeee!!!!]

I am writing this in view of the latest order by the Roman Catholic Church hierarchy to revive masses in Latin. [Latest?  Order?  This guy does not check his facts straight.] For me, this is an illogical move. [for someone illogical, yeah I think so.  It follows.] What would you feel if you attend a mass and you, together with the other churchgoers, don't understand what the priest is saying? Some priests could not even speak English fluently, how much more Latin? [So?]

What about the priest's homily, will it also be in Latin? [See that?  An ignoramus and he keeps on ranting.] Yes, there is a “codigo” or a guide for both the officiating priest and the churchgoers, but can priests read and pronounce the language well? [And he thinks that Masses in the vernacular don't have a codigo, or guide with which the priest and Mass goers use?  I am pretty sure this dimwit does not even know what a Sacramentary or Lectionary is.  But, hey!  I think he knows the National Liturgical Handbook of the Philippines, SAMBUHAY! But nooooooooooo!  He does not call them codigo!] Never mind the pronunciation. The most important is comprehension and understanding.  [MIGRAINE ATTACK!!!! Ahhhhh!!!!]

Ngano pa man gud nga atong lisud-lisuron ang mga pari ug mga manimbahay? Nganong di man gamiton ang English o Bisaya nga pinulungan? [Hey dude!  Even English is not used widely in Masses in the Philippines!  Go to Quiapo and its hard to chance a Mass in English!] Mas molig-on ug mohugot ang atong pagtuo sa Ginoo kun nakasabot ta sa atong gipangadye.  [Really?  Are you sure about that?  Using the vernacular would make the people more lively and would make them learn more of the Faith? No wonder the number of mass going Catholics in Europe is going down.  Wonderful work of the Spirit of Vatican 2, eh?]

I remember that when I was still a kid, my grandmother would oblige us to join her nightly prayers. [Begrundgingly?] My lola did not finish elementary schooling but she spoke in Spanish, because she was a Spanish mestiza, and she prayed in Latin.  [She did not finish schooling but she knows Latin.  And how about those attending Latin Mass today?  How many of them are college graduates?  Huh?  Wait!  An acolyte I knew just finished high school and he knows Latin, right Neil!  Give this guy an "Anathema sit!"]

I was forced to accompany [he is not happy to be Catholic.] her in praying because she would scold me if I refused. But I was not serious then in praying because I didn’t understand Latin. [Is he now serious becauseI hope churchgoers would not adopt the same kind of attitude I had if they attend masses in Latin. Basin mangatulog lang hinuon nang uban.  [Those who go to Latin Mass fall asleep according to him.  Maybe he does even in a Novus Ordo.  How sure is he that people fall asleep in a TLM?  Jesus' name is mentioned a lot of times, you need to bow your hear every time you hear His name spoken.  How in the world would you doze off?]



For all its worth, this guy just craves attention, that is why he writes attacks against the Catholic Church also known as "doing a Carlos Celdran".  If life is pathetic, your business is failing, you desperately crave for attention, then do the Carlos Celdran stunt.

And next time, do it in Dubai, like Carlos Celdran who got a reality check he deserves.

Did I type "he"?

Oh, bummer.

This guy equates the understanding of the language to the deep religiosity of Filipinos.  Hey!  But wait!  Filipinos were already deeply religious!  St. Lorenzo died praying the Traditional Latin Mass!  Blessed and soon to be canonized Pedro Calungsod also worshiped using the TLM!  Millions of Filipinos before Vatican 2 were already deeply religious.  In fact, the wave of nationalistic and masonic Aglipayanism diminished quickly.  The hatred of the Filipinos is not towards the Catholic religion.  So the Philippines remained Catholic!

But nooooooooooooo.....  genius Bobby Nalzaro thinks that it was because of the vernacular way of worshipping that makes more Catholics, that enriches them.

I am not saying that it is not true.  Yes, to speak the language of the people is a probably the best way to evangelize a person.  But to completely trash the linguistic heritage of the Church as something detrimental to the world.

In general, this guy does not even know what he is fighting against.  He knows jack squat about the Latin Mass and yet he has the audacity to mock it through his column.  What a way to make a big fool out of yourself in public.

Hey, BOBBY!  Try attending a Latin Mass first and holding a hand missal before you comment!

Try reading Summorum Pontificum first before you start clicking your keyboard.

Try talking to Archbishop Palma first before....oh wait.  No, stay away from him.  You just crave the attention.

Just attend TLM, read Summorum Pontificum and talk to high school kids who attend a TLM and ask them to teach you Latin.

You need a big serving of humble pie.

Imitating Carlos Celdran is dumbest thing a journalist like you should do.

PS:  I issue this challenge.

If Anscar Chupungco, Genaro Diwa, Sister Cecilia Payawal and all the bishops of the Philippines who are against the Latin Mass and who openly defy Pope Benedict XVI in his motu propio, Summorum Pontificum, think that the Latin Mass is only for the nostalgic and traditional loonies, then why not do this?


It's only for the minority isn't it?  What are you afraid of?

And one more thing.


Hey don't blame me for starting this.

Blame Bobo, I mean BOBBY NALZARO!


  1. I Agree with Both Demands. Especially the First One!

    and One More Thing:

    Latin Masses in Both the Extraordinary and Ordinary Forms Everyday in Schools,Hospitals,Offices.Malls(Hi Fr Mario!),Ships,Prisons,and Orphanages. as Well as on TV and Radio Every Sunday,Christmas,and Holy Week!


  2. Here is my "poor man's" defense of Latin. Mr. Nalzaro, when the priest speaks Latin in Church, he is not speaking to you, he is speaking to God who UNDERSTANDS Latin. If you want to pray "with" the priest all you have to do is get a missal and read the English version of the Latin prayers the priest is saying. You can even copy-paste latin-english versions of the missal from the internet. Plus the prayers in the Traditional Latin Mass is fixed, that if you will attend it RELIGIOUSLY, there will come a time that you may not need a missal and the "mysterious" Latin prayers the priest is saying will not sound mysterious anymore. Truly enough, the Devil HATES Latin and he will send his minions, even the dumbest of them all, to put a stop on it.

  3. Anathema ton Aionon!!! He can criticized me too for using Greek, by the way that means Anathema unto Ages. Here is the problem if you are trying to know everything even if your a total dumber, and we have a fine example of Bobo Nalzaro. Try to attend Latin Mass sometimes and also you will not also understand Novus Ordo even if you hear it in Vernacular

    Why also include in the Anti Latin List Rev Fr Sobrejuanite of the Megamall Liturgical Dancers hhmmm???