Thursday, January 27, 2011

A Catholic priest does not care if someone mocks the Eucharist!

Better late than never.

Sent to me by a friend who cares.

Remember the furor over the Dolphy movie Fr. Jejemon, where the "host" accidentally falls into a woman's cleavage?

A priest rants why the furor over the scene. Yup. A "Catholic"..."priest"...wonders why Catholics are mad over the public mockery of the Holy Eucharist.

I have to post this even if the article was written a month ago.


Why the ruckus over Dolphy?
by Fr. Ranhilio Callangan Aquino

I cannot, for the life of me, understand what all the furor over Dolphy’s latest caper is about. [Either you lived under a rock for the last century or you are playing dumb! Which obviously you are not being a Dean and all!] Angry text messages, full-length paid ads of condemnation, so-called prayer brigades of atonement—what mortal sin has he committed? All of the vitriol directed at him sounds so pharisaical, so hypocritical, and, at Christmastime, very “Herodian”! [Well, read Matthew 7:5 first! And get a mirror!]

In fact, Dolphy should be given by the Catholic Church an award. [He wants the Catholic Church to give an award to an actor who makes fun of the Eucharist.  And he has the audacity to be even called Catholic!]  For decades, he has made us laugh heartily over clean jokes, [uhh] sometimes naughty ones, a few bordering on toilet humor, but none really offensive except to the prudish. [Is he Dolphy's PR man or what?] And at all times, he has always endeavored to pass on a message, make a point for values, teach his audience a lesson or to [sic] about the things we hold dear and reverence. [Yeah, like having many wives?]  He does not deserve all this condemnation he is now receiving. [Yup.  He is definitely THE PR guy!]

What is so offensive about hosts falling in between cleavages or caught in dentures? [I'll leave the invectives to you folks.  Unprintable here!]  Technically, it was mere wafer that was involved, because I am sure Dolphy had no access to consecrated hosts—and he surely had equally good sense not to use them even if he had them.  [Sure.  Let's turn the table.  Let's take your photo and paint a swastika on your arm.  Or put a pitchfork and horns on your face?  How would that feel, eh?]  And do priests not joke about these matters, sometimes in even greener hues? [But do priests joke about it in public?  Do priests make movies about these?]  Certainly, the Lord in his greatness has a good laugh at Dolphy’s antics and only a scowl for hypocrites! [The Lord will laugh at Dolphy having multiple wives?  The Lord will laugh at the scenes of Dolphy's movie?  I heard a joke once that the Lord can play pranks on you but THIS IS RIDICULOUS!] “It is mercy I desire, not sacrifice!”— [You are a lawyer, Father so here is one for you!  NON SEQUITUR!] a declaration of priorities we would do well to remember at all times.

To be quite candid, I have enjoyed life more because of Dolphy’s amusing ways than because of the pontificating of bishops and their equally pompous priests and crusading lay leaders. [Why be a priest after all!] And since we are on the topic of liturgical propriety, I will dare a litany of what I consider offensive in liturgy:   [Now watch out for what this arrogant bas...says...]

Priests who don “tubeless” chasubles [he is making a mockery of the pianeta or Roman chasuble which has been in existence for hundreds of years]—with their bare, hairy arms sticking out of their chasubles, [he is offended by a man's hairy arms!] and dirty pants ending in equally dirty shoes, this is what is offensive. Please spare me the crap [spare us yours!] about the difficulties of parish work in far-flung areas [he hates working with people who haven't heard the Gospel.] because there is no logical connection between remoteness and sloppiness! Homilies that are a bizarre mix of naive catechism, pious belief, superstition and jejemon talk, this is equally offensive. [Darn!  I thought I will disagree with him completely!  Ok, one point for you.]  Priests who have lost the ability to read and who are incapable of serious study, who dish out crap that they pass on as ‘holy wisdom’ to their adoring congregations, this is truly injustice! [Are you talking about those who we see regularly on Sunday TV Mass?]  Bishops who identify their most unreasonable and unjust orders with the ”will of God”—this is truly blasphemous! [He is talking about the stand of the Church against artificial birth control.  He calls it blasphemous!]  Lay leaders who believe that being lector, or commentator or extraordinary minister of holy communion has put them in a class “above” the rest of sinful humanity —this is the new breed of pharisees. [Now that is just plain disrespectful!  How many did he meet that made him pass that judgement!  Well, just reading this DEAN's writing...he is soooo holy....soooo righteous....sooooooooooo.............]

And while “Simbang Gabi” is on—in fact about to end—let me add to this list, bishops, priests and their lay hatchet persons who make of religious feasts and celebrations fund-raising affairs, who boast of gargantuan structures and magnificent churches amid the squalor all around. [I guess he does not have a parish of his own that is why he can't have his own fund raising.  Boohoo!  Maybe being Dean of the College of Law is not a very rewarding eterprise after all!]  All these truly offend God. [He accuses of bishops trying to shove down our throats the 'will of God" and then he claims that what he claims as offenses like fund-raisers as "truly offend God."  Maybe he has an Unli-call load to his god.]  I too must confess guilt for many things I could have done, or done better or should not have done as a priest. [Well, start writing them down!  You'll need a lot of paper and ink.]

As for Dolphy, if such silly scenes from a movie are all that we have against him, let us beg for his forgiveness, and ask God to pardon our [your?] hypocrisy—and wish each other the humility of Mary’s heart who, rather than condemning the sinfulness of all around her who were not immaculately conceived as she was—rather magnified the greatness of the Lord!

I vote that Dolphy’s film be shown without cuts [I think he got unlimited passes.] —and let us all enjoy a merry Christmas!


For a lawayer and a priest, this guy misses EVERYTHING!

For all the filth that came out of your mouth, you should be thankful that you did not get the punishment that you so deserve that would have been meted out to you if you lived for about a century ago!

Pray for this man's soul!  Because by the looks of it, he does not believe in what it is to be a Catholic and a Priest of Jesus Christ.

He does not deserve to be a priest nor to be a Catholic.

With the logic, he presents like "it is not consecrated wafer" meaning it is not the Lord in the Eucharist but a representation, let us follow his "magisterium".

Let us paint a Nazi swastika on his face...

Let us upload a video of his photo printed on toilet paper, wipe our stinking behind nice and easy, then flush the damn thing down the toilet...

Let is print a big tarpaulin of his photo and let every Catholic who hates his vitriol spill every increment we can think of into it...



Let us see how you feel!

Then I'll write my post with this lead sentence:

"I cannot, for the life of me, understand what all the furor..."